I never thought the word positive will be the much dreaded word of this lifetime. I never knew that word will hurt me and break me like I was never broken before.
When I heard that NY is fastly becoming the epicenter of this pandemic, I didn't doubt myself when I decided to reconnect. I knew I would totally regret it if I didn't do anything just to make sure you're okay. And I was glad, so super glad you are doing fine. Perfectly fine that you are still out there doing the job. I got worried who doesn't and the fact that after all those years of avoiding just that name on my phone, I finally had to sent that simple "how are you?"
I am not religious, but eversince this pandemic started, every night I keep praying that soon this will be stopped. I prayed for all world, for all those who are suffering but I put more importance on you.
But soon, I broke down because, now positive is no longer a happy word. I know what I feel is a thousand more worse than what your family feels. I just hope I could tell you this is the worst feeling I've felt in a lifetime.
I have a lot of wish. I wish I could feel your hands intertwined with mine. I wish I could touch your face, I wish I could hug you so like I won't ever let go. But now my single most wanted wish is for you to get better even if I lose all those wishes just so they can grant that one.
